not THAT martha

And an alarm clock made all the difference...

2011-09-29T03:42:00.000-07:00

Our school district made a huge change in schedule on us this year. Last year Joey's school day was from 9-3:30. The afternoons were so short and packed with homework, dinner, and early bedtimes for my sweet kindergartner. This year, school is from 7:45-2! I love our long afternoons. We have time for homework AND playtime! The mornings, however, are tricky to get everyone up and out the door for the school bus at 7:12! Joey bounces out of bed wide awake each morning when his Anakin Lego mini figure alarm clock sounds at 6.

My Abby-girl, however, does not bounce as easily out of bed in the morning. In fact, dragging her out of bed each morning has become more and more difficult. Yesterday, poor Danny fought with her and didn't have her dressed until 7. So I decided to give her my old cheap-ie alarm clock to use in an attempt to help her be responsible for getting herself out of bed in the mornings. She wasn't very excited about the "gift" at first, but after we pretended to be asleep and hit the snooze button when it went off, she decided it was big stuff! She proudly showed off her new alarm clock to Grammie and Daddy before bed.

So, did it work??? Like a charm! She bounced right out of bed and brought me her alarm to turn off (she can only manage the snooze button) and was dressed with teeth brushed by 6:15!!! Here's hoping the charm of the alarm clock lasts more than one morning! I think Santa may be bringing her a Littlest Pet Shop alarm clock for Christmas! Instead of an alarm ringing, it meows and barks. Perfect for my sweet girl!

Post Surgery Update

2011-09-26T14:49:00.000-07:00

Dear friends,

Thank you SO much for the encouragement and prayers. My surgery today went pretty well. There was a rough patch when there was an area they were working in which wasn't numb. It was quickly corrected, but brought out my barely held in tears. Thankfully, it was the greatest team working on me and they kept me talking and distracted.

My team of doctors (oncology dermatologist, oncologist surgeon, and the best melanoma oncologist in AZ) talked about my case and they agree that my next step is localized radiation. So I will be meeting with a new member of my team in the next week or two, a radiation oncologist with hopes of beginning radiation on my back as soon as my incisions heal.

For the next few days, I will practice taking it easy and following some lifting restrictions. I'm not the best at this, so wish me luck!

My history with Melanoma

2011-09-26T14:41:00.000-07:00

2009

September 15 Dermatologist removes "unconcerning mole" from my back

September 17 Diagnosed with Malignant Melanoma

October 2 Wide excision of mole area and sentinel lymph node removal in left and right groin

October 21 Removal of all lymph nodes from left groin

December 16 Port install and first high dose interferon treatment

2010

January 12 Finish high dose interferon treatment

January 19 Begin lower dose self injections

June 18 Port removal (horrible experience!)

June 30, 2010 Danny begins new job

August 9, 2010 Joey begins kindergarten

December 24, 2010 Last dose of Interferon

December 30, 2010 CT/MRI

January 7, 2011 Appointment with Dr. Cranmar, told a tumor was found on CT

January 21, 2011 Surgery to remove tumor

February 3 Clean CT scans

March 14, 2011 Begin DERMA trial

June 3, 2011 Clear CT scan

June 16, 2011 See Warneke about concerns of lumps on surgery scar

July 6 Surgery to remove tumors

August 8 Joey begins first grade, Abby begins kindergarten

August 26, 2009 Clear Scan

September 12, 2011 Derm appointment finds recurrence of lumps under scar

September 26, 2011 Surgery to remove tumors

Recurrence three pre-surgery update

2011-09-25T14:45:00.000-07:00

I am going in tomorrow for removal of tumors on my back. It is pretty clear that this is another Melanoma recurrence. We will need to come up with a new treatment plan in the next few weeks. For now I appreciate prayers for a simple but complete removal tomorrow.
God is as good as he was when I was given my cancer free designation 4 weeks ago. We continue to ask Him to guide us in each new step.
I read this week that this is the "year of melanoma" and that advances in melanoma are being made "at light speed." If you'd like to show your support, we'd love for you to come walk with team ¡Mela-no-mas! or contribute to our team. Information is found in the link below.
I also would LOVE to know you are praying for me if you are willing to comment. Thanks for loving my family and walking with us through this so often discouraging journey.

http://fightmelanomatoday.org/teams/%C2%A1mela-no-mas/

Interferon Day 3 and the weekend

2009-12-20T14:57:00.000-08:00

Finishing up my first week of Interferon was pretty easy. I got a private room for my treatment on Friday which mean I got a real bed and a TV! At the end of my treatment, the access to my port was removed along with the gauze covering my two incisions. I'm pretty bruised, but the incisions aren't bad. I have numbing cream to prepare the area to be accessed again on Monday. I'm a little nervous about that process! Friday afternoon was much like Thursday. I slept until Danny got home and then felt good for the evening.

Saturday I woke up feeling good and normal! It was a nice surprise. We took it easy for most of the day and went out to dinner with my parents and then took the kids to Frost. It was warm enough to be out without jackets and walking around the shopping center with the kids was a blast! It was a totally unexpected gift to feel so good!

It was a surprise on Sunday to wake up feeling blah. I had a headache and shakes when I woke up (a little like low blood sugar shakes, but less severe.) I fought fatigue and dizziness most of the day. Kinda lame, but I'm going to have to learn to take advantage of the good days and rest on the bad. Tomorrow begins my first full week of treatment, I appreciate your prayers!

Interferon day 2

2009-12-18T07:44:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I woke up feeling great! My port was sore (I have two incisions that need to heal.) So I took some pain meds and got ready for the day. I even felt good enough to help the kids get dressed for school. My sweet friend Tina picked me up and drove me to The Cancer Center with her 11 month old adorable son Timothy. Danny stayed home to finish getting the kids ready for school and drop them off. I got my port plugged in and set up with my pre-interferon pepcid and benedryl. Filled the nurse in on my side effects from Wednesday. She hooked me up with numbing cream to prepare my port for the new needle on Monday (they'll take out the access today.) And Agnes and Carrie (NP and nurse who work with my oncologist) came to visit me and wrote a prescription for anti-nausea meds for me. The benedryl knocked me out quickly after that and I slept through the rest. Danny picked me up and dropped me off at home. I made him pick up the anti-nausea meds for me, which of course I didn't need then. I slept until Danny came home and felt good last night! The kids spent the night at my folks which makes the morning easy for us!

Today I'm looking forward to being finished for the week! Getting the port access out so I can shower (my hair is GREASY!) Removal of the bandages on my port wounds (the tape is itchy!) Playing with the kids this weekend and celebrating that so far I feel MUCH better than I expected to! I have been warned that the effects of the Interferon can be cumulative, so I may end up crashing more than I want to. Time to get socks and shoes on and head out for day 3!

Thanks for the prayers!!! (this hasn't been proof read, forgive me!)

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Port and Interferon Day 1

2009-12-17T06:31:00.000-08:00

A very quick update before I get ready to head to The Cancer Center again this morning. Yesterday went about as well or better than I hoped. Having the port placed was slightly more traumatic than I anticipated. Mostly because the schedule was messed up and I was in the OR all prepped on the cold, cold table for a LONG time before the Dr showed up and they gave me the "I don't care what you do" drugs. I actually have a double port which is allowing my chemo to go faster! The other patients in the room with me yesterday were jealous and my nurse was delighted.

The facitity and nurse were awesome yesterday. The other patients were very warm and sweet too. One of my pre drugs is benedryl, so I slept for most of my infusion. I'd guess that will be common. I got the shakes as we left, but they went away quickly. I was still pretty tired, so I went straight to bed when we got home. At home, my stomach got upset and I got sick a couple times. We got home at around 5 and it was bad until about 8:30 when Danny brought me my next dose of pain killers and benedryl. After that I felt better, snacked a little, and fell asleep and was out most of the night. I'm feeling good this morning, other than my port being sore.

Thanks to everyone for the prayers. Today my treatment is at 9. Danny will bring me home afterward and I'll be on my own for the afternoon. (Hopefully I'll just sleep.) The first day is supposed to be the worst and it's behind me! Hurray!

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A Mommy timeout from the policeman

2009-12-14T20:34:00.000-08:00

I got pulled over today for the first time in 10 years. 2nd time ever. Our tags expired in May '09 (my mouth dropped when he told me.) No registration in the glove compartment, proof of insurance expired 2 days ago... thankfully legally we're caught up, but my paperwork was sorely lacking. We misplaced the new tags back in May and just never thought about it. Thankfully the officer was super gracious and wrote me a warning. Scolded me for not ordering a new license with my current address (although it was changed in the system.) I cried, which drove ME crazy, but I was thankful for a warning and the chance to correct things before I got a ticket. I was trying to figure out how I was going to fit going to traffic school in with chemo (which prompted the tears.) I'm such a pleaser and have a more than healthy fear of authority, it's a BIG deal to be pulled over. I think I can laugh about the comedy of errors now.... I think!

In other good news, my lung function test went fine. I was a little below average, but I didn't tell the 50 year old man who was doing my test that my spanx I'm using to prevent my lymphedema swelling may have limited my breathing some. Teehee!

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The coming week and my inner preacher escapes a bit

2009-12-13T18:24:00.000-08:00

I AM beginning my year of interferon treatment this Wednesday! I am ready to begin actively fighting! I'm also frightened about embarking on this journey in which I don't know what to expect. My next blog post is going to be a list of side effects of interferon since they are different than with traditional chemotherapy. I'm hoping that my prayer warriors will be able to pray specifically against the side affects.

Monday I have an appointment at UMC for a pulmonary function test. The kids are going to hang out at work with Danny while I have that done. It's supposed to be quick! Wednesday morning I have to be at UMC at 8am (EARLY for us!) to have my portacath installed*. That procedure will take up most of the morning. At noon, I am to report to The Cancer Center. At 1pm, I am scheduled for another baseline x-ray. Then at 2:30, I have my first Intron Alfa-2b Treatment. The treatment will take 2-3 hours, so we'll head home around 5pm to see what fabulous side effects I'll enjoy! (The first dose apparently is the worst and it usually gets better from there.) Thursday I have to be at The Cancer Center at 9am for my second treatment. My sweet friend Tina has agreed to drive me there so Danny can get our kids off to preschool. Friday is another interferon treatment, but I don't know the time yet. The positive thing about having to be at The Cancer Center for 3 hours a day/ 5 days a week is I anticipate the time will go quickly!

Thanks to everyone who is praying for me and has taken the time to read all the details of my week. I know that typing this out helps me process everything. I read an incredible perspective of suffering and healing on Beth Moore's LPM blog today. I am hoping to share this attitude of expectancy for the change God has to do in my heart and spirit. Not bad change, but His transforming work. As Beth said, I will NOT end this journey the same as I began it. "If I am[the same], I will have missed something huge. Something vital. Something life-changing between Jesus and me. And I do not plan to miss it for this world. It's why He has me here. " I've prayed that God would transform me to love like Him at ANY cost. I don't plan to waste this experience.

Amen and amen!

*I will be considering myself part Borg from then until it's removed. Resistance to my dorkiness is futile!

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Treatment plan

2009-12-10T18:14:00.000-08:00

Today was a big day of appointments! This morning I had my first appointment with the dermatologist at the Cancer Center. She was very nice and went over all my background infomation with me and then did a full body check for suspicious moles. She was very personable and the check was easier than I anticipated! She said I'm a pretty simple case and there are only two moles she wants me to watch. She instructed me to do monthly skin checks myself and only needs to see me every six months! After seeing Dr. Curiel, I was talked to by a health educator about sunscreen and wearing long sleeves(cue eye roll on my part) and given some sunscreen samples. I heart samples!

Danny and I took a break from the cancer center for lunch. After lunch, we met with Dr. Cranmer, my oncologist. He was FULL of information and made sure we understood his role as well as interferon and the controversy surrounding the treatment. Essentially, it's not a super effective medication, but it does improve odds for some people and is the only treatment available. The current plan is for me to start Interferon next Wednesday, the 16th. I need to have a pulmonary function test, chest x-ray, and IV port put in before I can start. So, I have a busy few days in front of me! I will be having 20 days (4 weeks, 5 days per week) of high dose interferon followed by 11 months of 3x per week self administered (by injection) low dose interferon. Interferon is a protein the body makes naturally to fight infection. So, although I am hopefully already cancer free, Interferon will increase my immune system and help it defeat any remaining melanoma cells in my body. I am also starting an antidepressant tomorrow since 40% of patients on interferon struggle with depression and an antidepressant is considered part of the course of treatment.

In the last part of the afternoon, I took part in some "word games" as part of a study and had bloodwork drawn. At 4:30 we finally left to pick up the kids from my parents after a LONG afternoon! I'm glad to be home and have the appointments behind me. I dread beginning the treatment, but I am glad to begin putting it behind me!

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Great day and Jesse Tree Celebration!

2009-12-01T21:08:00.000-08:00

It's December already! It was a great day. We are back to a normal schedule this week. I took the kids to school this morning (although Danny was sweet enough to help me get the kids ready.) It was a super productive morning. I got some VERY overdue books returned to the library, hit the grocery store twice, made a new jesse ornament (more on that later), had the car washed, made homemade butternut squash soup and took care of kids! It was a MAJOR victory for this girl who has been on the couch recovering from surgery for the past two months!

Tonight we started our advent celebration with the kids. It's a variation of a Jesse Tree which is a Christmas tradition explained best here. He's an excerpt from their website. Jesse Trees are all over the internet now, but this website is where I found the first and best information when I started researching this tradition a few years ago.

What is a Jesse Tree? It is a tree branch decorated with symbols representing the stories of people in Jesus' family tree. In Isaiah 11:1 we read, "A shoot shall come out from the stump of Jesse, and a branch shall grow out of his roots." Jesse was the father of David, Israel's greatest king. And it was from David's lineage that Jesus came. That's where the idea of using a Jesse Tree to celebrate Advent came from. Before a symbol is hung on the branch, a Bible passage or a story from a story Bible is read.

I've augmented our tradition a bit. I picked stories and ornaments to fit with our favorite children's Bible. The Children's Storybook Bible fits with the Jesse Tree tradition perfectly. Every story is written in a way that points to the promise of Jesus. It is absolutely beautiful. I'm making felt ornaments for us.

This is our first ornament. It's supposed to be an open Bible. It's not my favorite and I'll redo it... someday! Tonight we told the kids, "The Bible tells us about peole who waited for Jesus to come.

This ornament represents creation.

This apple represents the fall of man to sin in the garden of Eden.

This is Noah's Ark, I LOVE it1

This is the tower of Babel. God knew people could never reach heaven on their own. They needed heaven to come down to them.

This ornament represents God's promise to Abraham that he would have descendents that outnumbered the stars in the sky. This is the ornament I made today. Cute, no?

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A lazy bullet point update...

2009-11-25T22:33:00.000-08:00

Since I last posted I've...

experienced a VERY painful infection at my drain spot
had my drain removed after a month! thank God!
lost the ability to straighten my left leg entirely
developed a bad habit of keeping my weight on my right leg with my left knee bent
worked to almost straighten my leg and reduce my limp
freaked out doing lymphedemia research and experiencing swelling in my leg
tried to find a suitable compression garment to aid swelling
been more mad at God than ever before in my life
cried and cried
enjoyed my family in ways I never knew before
started walking to get in shape after 4 weeks on dr ordered "leg rest"
gained back the weight I lost between surgeries *see above 6 weeks on couch
detoxed from 7 weeks of vicodin and percoset -that sucked, but I did it!
turned 30
been whisked away for a romantic weekend with my husband
had 2 new dishwashers installed
wished I could wake up from my nightmare
hated how this is affecting my kids
hidden from people who love me
read a life changing article from John Piper called "Don't Waste Your Cancer"
been overwhelmed at the information i wanted to share here
watched WAY too much TV
found out my lymph nodes were free of cancer other than the original one they removed
wanted my healthy lymph nodes back
dreaded the year of treatment that feels like it's never going to start
made an appointment for Dec 9 with the oncologist who will plan my treatment
hoped to start treatment the next Monday because I want it BEHIND ME!!!
realized I'll probably miss Christmas because of this, but I just want it done
received a ton of love from family and friends in the form of phone calls and mail. thanks.

I'm sorry this is mainly negative. I'm trying to be real. It's such an odd thing to most likely be "cancer free" yet be looking forward to a year of treatments that are going to make me sick. It feels so unfair, not just to me, but to Danny, my kids and my family. Danny and I counted last night and I've had 6 surgeries in the past 5 years. It's been a lot.

I do not believe that this song was playing by accident as I wrote this... God is good!

Wait and See (selected lyrics)

by Brandon Heath

There is hope for me yet
Because God won’t forget
All the plans he’s made for me
I have to wait and see
He’s not finished with me yet

Still wondering why I’m here
Still wrestling with my fear
But oh, He’s up to something
And the farther on I go
I’ve seen enough to know
That I’m, not here for nothing
He’s up to something

I'll post something more positive tomorrow for Thanksgiving. I have much to be thankful for.

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Happy Birthday Danny!

2009-11-09T10:02:00.000-08:00

This is my husband. He's the best friend I've ever known. He loves me on my ugly (inside and out) days. He's an awesome dad. We're a great team. Danny has walked with me through more health issues than we ever could have imagined when we promised "in sickness and in health." He takes care of me, the kids, the house, and a full time job. We are blessed with family and friends who help shoulder the burden, but he does more than anyone can probably imagine.

Danny, you are one of the most selfless people I know. I am so glad you choose me to share your life. I look forward to celebrating many many more birthdays with you. I love you.

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Our new routine...

2009-10-26T17:24:00.000-07:00

What's life like as a Melanoma patient? At the moment, it's pretty darn boring! We started a new family routine today that will carry us through my first month of interferon treatment and perhaps for awhile afterward. I'm hoping to be able take over most of the kid duty after that first intense month of treatment. At the moment the kids are going to school full days on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays. Danny drops them off at 9 and my Mom is picking them up at 4. Mom takes them back to her house and then Danny picks them up on his way home from work around 5:30. I predict they will be exhausted and I am going to learn new appreciation for those evening hours with them. (Or, they'll be grumpy and I'll just want to put them to bed like normal!) :) On Wednesdays through my first month of treatment, my Mom will have the kids for the day and is going to help me with some laundry and housework. My Dad is changing his work schedule so he can watch the kids on Fridays. Once I start treatment, Danny will drop me off at the cancer center (very close to work for him) in the mornings and then drive me home at lunchtime.

It's been a semi-rough day emotionally. Being a stay at home mom is SO important to me and although this is for a limited time, it's tearing out my heart to not be able to take care of the kids. Cancer has taken away a little of my identity as a mom and it's just another reason cancer sucks. My kids couldn't be in better hands. I just talked to Mom and Joey did well today, but Abby is struggling. She's been showing more anger lately. We're trying to stay consistent with discipline and grace. Both kids ask about my drain and back. Abby is a little more interested in the drain and is already asking when I can "take it off." We watched the Arthur episode about cancer with the kids last night. We haven't explained that Mom has cancer. They've probably heard me talk about it on the phone. We'll probably talk about it more specifically this week as we adjust to our new routine. Please pray for all of us as we adjust!

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Lymph node dissection

2009-10-21T22:54:00.000-07:00

Couple updates from today...

Although I wanted to run away and skip surgery today, the surgery went MUCH better than expected. NO med students involved today which was wonderful! I know they need to learn, but I am such an introvert, their presence is really disturbing to me. Sorry friends in med school!
I'm on percocet and feel better than I did yesterday on Vicodin! I am for sure a percocet girl!
My back stitches are out! I'm much less itchy and more comfortable, although that may be the percocet. :)
The drain isn't as bad as I imagined. It is going to be hard to hide under my clothes. My left leg is going to have a noticable lump for the next few weeks!
My CT scan came back clean! Praise God!
Dr Warneke showed us the original pathology and the amount of melanoma in the lymph node was 0.2mm. TINY! Dr. Warneke said he expects the nodes he removed today to be clear which gives me a 50% chance of being cured. Excellent odds for melanoma. If I'm not cured, I'm in for a fight with melanoma that reappears. I'm still going to win this battle!

Thanks for all the prayers today. I had the BEST nurses and things went very well for a day that well... let's just say surgery is losing it's charm for this girl. I'm hopefully done for a LONG while!

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Wonderfully normal

2009-10-20T14:44:00.000-07:00

I got the kids ready and delivered them to and from school today. It was wonderfully normal! Abby hid from me when I went to pick her up. She did NOT want to come home! This made me feel better about her going all day next week (T/TH). Joey will do great, but my baby I worried about. It will be especially nice that Joey and Abby will be together for lunch and the afternoon class. We are SO blessed with incredible teachers at their school. When I first got my diagnosis, I asked God why this couldn't have waited until the kids were both in school all day so their daily schedules wouldn't be so interrupted by my being sick. But, it's become abundantly clear that the flexibility of Light the Way and most importantly, the love their teachers have for them and our whole family is going to be such a blessing to us as we walk this road. There is NOWHERE I'd rather my kid be than with their sweet teachers if they can't be with me.

The kids are napping and I am spending naptime previewing an Aurthur I recorded to possibly show the kids. All this week, PBS is playing a special episode about cancer. Lance Armstrong "guest stars" in cartoon form in this episode. We haven't told the kids that I have cancer. Just that I had a mole that could make me sick that the doctor cut off. We still have some decisions to make about what we are going to tell them. I'd appreciate prayer for wisdom in that and peace for our sweet kids. Abby's first words to me this morning when I woke her up and carried her to the living room were "Mommy, does your back feel better now?" So, they are definitely aware of how I'm doing.

Tomorrow is my lymph node dissection. It will be sometime in the afternoon. The kids are staying with my parents for a couple nights. I'm off to rest and call for my report time tomorrow!

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CT scan

2009-10-19T20:19:00.000-07:00

Today was my Dad's turn to be my chaffeur. I think by the time I'm through this "trial," I'm going to need driving lessons because I haven't driven in such a long time. Except, I'm taking the kids to school tomorrow and I guess that will be enough driving practice to make up for the last month of driving withdrawal. Anyway... my sweet Dad picked us up at noon and we took the kids to Matt and Alli's for the afternoon. Bless them for sacrificing their kids' nap time and their quiet time for me!

After dropping off the kids, we headed to the Medical Imaging place. I was very nervous about the barium drink. I had a CT scan in May before my hysterectomy and that thick barium just barely went down. It was terrible! I was VERY pleasantly surprised when I found out the imaging facility I went to has a "fruit punch" drink instead of the thick barium. It wasn't yummy, but it was thin like water and easy to get finished quickly! I then read* and waited for my turn to have my scan. The scan was easy. I loved that they didn't make me change into a hospital gown! The tech did an awesome job getting the IV in one stick and listened to me when I recommended which arm had the best vein! The whole thing was easy and I'll hear the results tomorrow. The scan was to check and make sure the melanoma hasn't metastized into any organs or other areas of my body. I have a lot of peace about the results. Especially because the melanoma was only in one of my lymph nodes that they removed. It shouldn't have had a chance to move anywhere else!

After my scan we went to the cancer center for a quick visit with my amazing nurse coordinator, Lindy. My incision is looking awesome, but each of the places where my stiches come through my skin are bright pink, swollen, and burn! Apparently this is normal and my incision area is healing wonderfully! She took some time to explain the drain that is going to be put in on Wednesday and what we will need to do to take care of it.

This is a picture of what the drainage tube will be. The white part is under the skin and the bulb acts as a vacuum to gently pull out fluid and can be removed to drain it. How am I going to hide this under my clothes? Any ideas? I will keep the drain until I am having less than 30cc's of fluid drain in 24 hours. Lindy warned me that my body is NOT going to happy that I am having surgery again and I should plan on it not being an easy recovery. She also reminded me to be eating well and sleeping and recommended Ensure for days I have trouble eating. It was a good appointment and I'm glad I got to see her before my surgery on Wednesday!

We went to get the kids and they were horridly behaved because they didn't want to come home! Abby cried until she fell asleep in her carseat and Joey was quite pouty. Vegging in front of the TV, cuddles with Mom and a snack cured the grumps and we were glad to see Danny home a little early!

Tomorrow brings preschool after a week off. Hooray!!! I'll be on my own tomorrow and look forward to one last day with just the kids and me before another round of recovery!

*I started reading "Get out of that Pit" by Beth Moore today. It talks about three different types of pits people end up in. The pit I identify with right now is the one you're "thrown into" I really am excited to see what Beth has to say about how to get out of this pit that I didn't chose and feel like was thrown on me rather than me falling into it! It is important to me that I use this time to learn every lesson God has for me as much as I can instead of just coping and getting through it. I'm sure there will be days that the best I can do is get through, but my God is big enough to use even the worst days to teach me about His comfort and love.

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Reality hits

2009-10-15T22:51:00.000-07:00

Last night I hit a wall emotionally. For a couple days I had kept thinking, "This isn't what I asked for. This isn't what I want." It probably sounds stupid, but it was the way I was processing and accepting my new reality. Last night we went to bed late and I just fell apart without any warning to poor Danny. I sobbed and raged and spilled every awful thought and fear I'd tried not to have in the past month. The emotion surprised me as much as it did Danny, I think. After going through about half a box of kleenex, I settled down enough to get to sleep around 1:30am. Poor Danny got less sleep than I did when Joey woke him up after a bad dream and wanted to cuddle. The alarm went off at 7:15 and Danny called my Mom to ask her to cancel our morning plans. She sweetly offered to take the kids and she and Danny got them ready before I even woke up. I am well cared for. I woke up and Danny was on the phone with Lindy, the nurse coordinator for melanoma patients figuring out why my stitches are driving my crazy and getting a refill of pain meds for me.

I ended up calling Lindy later in the morning, finally ready to ask the question I've been too scared to ask. If my lymph node dissection comes back clear, will I need to do the year of interferon treatment (the equivalent treatment to chemo for melanoma?) The answer was a solid yes. It's my best chance to prevent recurrence. Once the drain comes out after my lymph node dissection, I will begin a month of high dose treatments, followed by 11 months of self administered shots. I had thought I was out of tears, but there were a few more at this confirmation. I'm so thankful the kids weren't home. THANK YOU MOM!

Now we begin making plans. For my first month of treatment, it sounds like I will need rides to and from the cancer 5 days a week and the advice I am hearing from other interferon recipients is I won't be up to taking care of the kids, so we're going to need to figure that out. We have some good beginnings for those plans and I am so thankful for the community of support we have.

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Thankful...

2009-10-12T19:25:00.000-07:00

Impulsive trips to Phoenix for lunch at a park and a visit to IKEA
Elice (my next door neighbor growing up) and her visit while I was in recovery and Danny was in the waiting room
that Dr Warneke took 2 lymph nodes from the left side so even though one showed cancer cells, we know because the second didn't!
flexibility at work for Danny and a compassionate boss and coworkers
prayers and love from family and friends
kids who are great sources of something to think about other than the c-word
a high school friend studying oncology and offering support and information based on her knowledge and passion
meals to feed my hungry growing kids
fall weather, open windows and a new screen door on my back porch!

"Consider it a sheer gift, Martha, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you ... Read Morebecome mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way. If you don't know what you're doing, pray to the Father. He loves to help. You'll get his help, and won't be condescended to when you ask for it." James 1:2-5 (adapted for me by my sweet friend Amber)

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pathology results

2009-10-08T17:52:00.000-07:00

After a LONG day of waiting for a call, Danny finally got through to our nurse coordinator, Lindy. The margins on my back are clear of melanoma (which means there is a 2cm cancer free border, side to side and deep, of the area they removed on my back.) The two lymph nodes they removed from my right leg were clear, but on the left side there were traces of melanoma in the sentinal node (the first node lymph reached from my back) although the second node was clear. This is a really excellent sign that the melanoma spread is most likely limited. I will have more surgery to remove the rest of the lymph nodes from my left leg and a PET and CAT scan at some point. Tomorrow I'll get a call about scheduling.

It's not the news we were hoping for, but we are hopeful. The nurse was very emphatic that this is NOT devastating news. I'm dreading more surgery and the swelling that accompanies the the loss of more lymph nodes. We're going to need our community to help as I recover again. I'm not up for talking. Danny has been my sweet spokesman all day. I appreciate continued prayers for healing and peace.

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Surgery day- part 2 Have you ever smoked?

2009-10-04T21:27:00.000-07:00

When we got to the check in desk, we were greeted with a bright "We've been waiting for you!" Danny was given a patient number for me and told he could watch a screen to see where I was in the process of pre-op, surgery, recovery and some other designation. It's much like at the airport to tell you when flights are arriving and boarding. It sounded great, but apparently I never moved from the pre-op spot on the screen, so... anti climatic. :)

I got signed in at the front desk and went straight to registration where they asked me AGAIN if I'm a smoker (no) and how much a drink alcohol (less than two drinks a week.) Dr W came and found us in registration to get the pictures of my scan from me (apparently he'd been pacing the halls waiting for us.) He quickly looked at them, and told us he would probably remove two lymph nodes from one side and one from the other. We got to sit in the waiting room for a couple of minutes before a nurse tech brought us back to the pre op area and took my blood pressure and asked if I smoked or drank. She then handed me off to my nurse, Kim (a guy) who had me change into my pretty hospital gown, gave me my bracelet and asked if I drank or smoked. The next 20 minutes were a blur or meeting residents and med students and anesthesiologists. There was a much too long failed IV attempt by a med student before Kim my man nurse saved the day by getting an IV in while another anesthesia student was tying off and checking out my other arm for good veins. Thank you God for Kim. The anestesia student REALLY seemed to want to give me an IV, he kept telling me it might need to be redone while I was in surgery. I woke up with the original IV, so I think he missed out on my vein awesomeness. I said goodbye to my sweet husband and they gave me my "happy juice" and rolled me off to the operating room.

I woke up in recovery and most of what happened after that is a blur of a sore back and nausea. Maybe Danny can post about the rest of the day.

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Surgery day- part 1 Where Martha becomes radioactive

2009-10-03T21:31:00.000-07:00

It's 3am and my day of sleep has caught up to me, I have a little bit of insomia. Thankfully, I'm feeling pretty good. The house is so peaceful tonight. My sweet brother paid for my house to be cleaned today while we were at the hospital and this woman worked her rear off! It was SO nice to come home to! Thanks James! It's raining outside and I feel wrapped in Gods peace. Thought I'd spend some time writing about what happened today while I remember it!

We woke up at 6 to get ready for the day. We were due to report to Nuclear Medicine at 7:30. Nuclear medicine is in the basement of the hospital and the place looked like a bunker. The reception window was very narrow and surrounded with stainless steel. There were classic yellow with burgandy print radiation warning signs on the walls. There was only one radiologist, Bill, working that early and one other patient there when we arrived. Bill came to the waiting room to get me and let Danny know the scan would take about 45 minutes. He sat down with me and explained exactly what he was going to do and was very sweet about helping me find the most modest way to cover myself with two gowns and a blanket. I started out laying on my stomach while he injected the radioactive dye in 4 spots around the biopsy site (where my mole used to be.) The needle sticks were easy, but the dye burned as it was injected. Once the dye was injected, he firmly massaged the area to get the dye started moving into my lymph channels. I then flipped onto my back and (... got nauseous and fell asleep on the couch before I could finish my story...:)

Once the dye was injected, I laid under a large x-ray machine and the tech took photos of the dye moving through my lymph channels to my lymph nodes at 15 minutes, 10 minutes, 5 minutes, and 3 minutes. Mine went around both sides of my hips into lymph nodes at the tops of my legs on either side. I'm SO thankful it didn't got to my armpits! The technician took photos for the surgeon and then marked my legs where the lymph nodes were. He then made sure I understood that the dye indicated the lymph channels in my body, but indicated NOTHING about cancer. Based on where the dye traveled, the technician guessed I would have two lymph nodes removed on one side, and one removed on the other side.

By the time all this was finished, I was about 5 minutes late for my surgery report time at 9am. My sweet technician took us up the "Emergency Only" elevators (they also are designated for transporting radioactive material, which apparently, I was!) and walked me to check into surgery where they were waiting for us.

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Surgery info

2009-10-01T21:03:00.000-07:00

For those of you who have asked...

I will go to nuclear medicine tomorrow at 7:30am for a scan in preparation for my sentinel node biopsy. They will then send me upstairs for surgery that is scheduled at 9am. Someone has been praying, because it was originally scheduled at noon! I'm thankful to not have to wait.

Thanks for all your prayers. My parents have our kids tonight and tomorrow night. Poor Danny is knee deep in the cold I've had and I have just started coughing. Please pray that we will wake up feeling like new people and that my surgery will be able to go ahead as scheduled (I was told they won't postpone it unless I'm very run down or running a fever, so I think I'll be good to go ahead.) Thank you so much for the incredible prayer covering we have felt. We will update tomorrow, but we won't know the results of the surgery until next Thursday.

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To everyone I've slighted in the past weeks

2009-09-28T17:04:00.000-07:00

I am in full on introvert mode and don't feel much like talking to anyone. Especially when I know calls are probably going to discuss the c-word. Yes, I'm screening my calls. No, I haven't been replying to voice mails or emails. Partly because I'm trying to protect the kids from overhearing scary things and partly because if I could, I would be spending the week in bed with my covers over my head. I am SO appreciative of all the sweet thoughts and nice notes on facebook and email. They mean the world to me. I would assume I'll have days I'll want to chat, but for now, please forgive my behavior that has Emily Post rolling over in her grave right now.

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Arizona Cancer Center

2009-09-25T15:25:00.000-07:00

Yesterday (9/24) was my first appointment at Arizona Cancer Center since my Malignant Melanoma diagnosis last Wednesday. Right away, Danny and I were completely impressed with the center. It's a new facility with pretty landscaping outside. The lobby is huge and lovely with a player piano (a three year old was "helping" play when we first walked in. We started at check in and were warmly welcomed and given a pager that looked like the discs you are given when waiting at a restaurant. It had a readout on it that instructed us where to go when it vibrated. We had just a minute to sit down and notice the book lending libraries when the pager alerted us it was time to go to registration. We were greeted at the door of the registration room and got all signed in with health insurance. Thank you Lord for our health insurance! We then were walked to my doctor's office, on the way we got a mini tour of the facility. There is a Sunstone rescource center for support groups, nutrition, and massage information, a lab on site, free WiFi available, computers for visitor use, a library and a cafe where you can get a free drink and snack each time you are there for an appointment. I had new patient paperwork to fill out, then we were taken back to wait for Dr Warneke. Highlights of our wait were changing into a highly fashionable hospital gown and then figuring out I needed to go into the hallway to pee. I HATE that! Two surgical residents came and looked at my back, asked some questions and left. Dr. Warneke came in a bit later. He was warm and kind. He looked at the spot on my lower back "formerly known as my mole" and did some probing of my lymph nodes. He explained that the size of my melanoma was intermediate, which means we didn't catch it early, but we didn't catch it late, either. There is about a 20% chance that the melanoma has spread to my lymph nodes. But, it is highly curable at this point. I will be having surgery this coming Friday (October 2.) They will remove a large oval of skin around the melanoma to make sure there is a "clear border" of healthy cells around what they remove. The oval will be about 4" x 3". They assure me that everyone has plenty of back skin to compensate for this hole they're making. Lucky me will have a scar on my back to match my c-section scar on my front! They will also be injecting a dye around the mole before surgery and doing a scan to see which lymph nodes drain the area around my mole. Dr Warneke will remove the first lymph node the dye reaches and it will be sent to pathology to test for cancer cells. The pathology results should be available sometime on Thursday October 8th. If the lymph node is clear, I will see a dermatologist ever 3 months for the next 2 years. If the lymph node shows signs of cancer, I will be put on a medicine called Interferon which suppresses the melanoma. It isn't chemo, but it has it's "fair share of side effects." Dr. Warneke said it feels like you have the flu for a year. We then met with the nurse coordinator who gave us more information about post op care and melanoma treatment. She even called me this morning to check on me and ask if I had questions! I had some lab work drawn and was given orders for a chest x-ray.
Danny and I left feeling well taken care of and very hopeful. I'm sure it was in large part due to the incredible prayer coverage we had from our friends. I am at peace about the future. Thank you for the incredible support we've been given.

The colonoscopy was supposed to be the bad part of my week

2009-09-18T15:22:00.000-07:00

This has been the longest and scariest week ever. I had a colonoscopy on Monday to begin the process of helping my IBS symptoms. Thankfully, it didn't show anything bad. Whew! Get on with my week, right? Tuesday was my "easy" appointment of the week. Went to the dermatologist seeking acne treatment and to have a mole on my back removed. I knew it needed to be removed and checked, but never would have guessed I'd get a call the next day that it was Malignant Melanoma. My world is upside down. I'm waiting for a call from the AZ Cancer Center and waiting sucks. I'd probably better get used to it, eh?

2007-08-31T20:53:00.001-07:00

Free TV!

2007-08-09T12:51:00.000-07:00

5 Minutes for Mom is giving away a 37" flat screen HDTV from Best Buy! I am one of 1500 entrants! Wish me luck, and go enter yourself!

Food Journal Thursday Aug 2

2007-08-02T13:10:00.000-07:00

Food	points	Countdown
Daily Point Target		21
Coffee	1	20
WW smoothie	1	19
snack w/kids	1	18
rice puff cereal	1	17
soy milk	2	15
various crap i shouldn't have snacked on	6	9





Totals
Day 2 in Week - Weekly DU Remaining: 22
Morning Weigh in 137.2
Activity Log

Haircut today!

2007-08-01T21:53:00.001-07:00

Before...
After!

I love it! The color is a lighter blonde than I've gone before. It's very cute and feels much lighter and healthier than before! I am just NOT photogenic! Ugh!

Food Journal Wednesday Aug 1

2007-08-01T07:58:00.000-07:00

How on earth did it get to be August already!?! Ouch! I cut WAY into my points today. I had a hair appt and didn't eat before I went at 4:45. Then when I got home at 7:30 I was starved and DOVE into pizza! I'll have to hoard the rest of my "bonus" points for girls dessert night on Saturday. Even then, I'd better bring a veggie tray or something! The good news is, I lost some weight in hair today!

Food	DU	Countdown
Daily DU Target		21
WW yogurt smoothie	1	20
coffee	1	19
grilled cheese (1.5 sandwiches)	9	10
ice cream bar (x2) blush!	6	4
pineapple	2	2
2 slices meat lovers pizza	11	-9
1 chicken wing	2	-11
dehydrated apple	1	-12
V-8	1	-13


Totals
Day 2 in Week - Weekly DU Remaining: 22
Morning Weigh in 137.5
Activity Log

Weight Watchers

2007-07-31T08:57:00.001-07:00

So, I have been doing Weight Watchers for the past 6 weeks. I've had great success the weeks I've tracked what I eat and gained weight the weeks I don't. It's amazing that the program works great when I follow it! :) I hate keeping track of my points in the little books, so I'm going to try to blog them for now.

Today felt a little like going to confession (well what I guess going to confession would feel like, I've never been.) Forgive me Joanne (my WW leader) for I have sinned. It's been two weeks since my last weigh-in. I have gained 3 and a half pounds since my last weigh in. Ugh!

My Weight Chart:

Food Journal Tuesday July 31

2007-07-31T08:44:00.000-07:00

Food	DU	Countdown
Daily DU Target		21
Weight Watchers Smoothie	1	20
Coffee	1	19
Annie's Mac and cheese	5	16
pineapple	2	14
chicken delicious	4	10
brown rice	4	6
lite caesar salad	2	4
ghiradelli caramel square	2	2
ice cream bar	2	0


Totals		21
Day 1 in Week - Weekly DU Remaining: 35
Check off your waters XXX
Activity Log

Meal Plan Monday June 4th

2007-06-03T21:17:00.001-07:00

This is a crazy week, so I'm getting myself organized! Organization begins with a meal plan, as far as I'm concerned. Dinners this week are fairly easy with two birthdays!

Monday - leftover BBQ chicken sandwiches on wheat buns with zuchinni and carrots
Tuesday - Happy Birthday Mom! (dinner out)
Wednesday - Happy Birthday Abby! BBQ burgers and hot dogs (and chicken for Papa?), potato salad, chips, and corn on the cob, Grammie's bringing the cake!
Thursday - homemade sesame chicken with stir fry veggies (darn! should have bought that wok at ikea this weekend!)
Friday - sour cream chicken enchiladas (double recipe to freeze)

Egg on my face

2007-04-13T07:56:00.000-07:00

I am so thankful for God protection this morning. I was making a simple egg yolk in the microwave for Abby this morning (she can't have highly allergenic egg whites yet) and had cooked the yolk in a small custard cup that has become standard for our microwave egg adventures. I was pretty sure the yolk was all cooked so I took it out of the microwave and, while holding the custard cup, proceeded to cut into the yolk with a fork to make sure it wasn't runny.

BAM! The yolk exploded. I screamed as I felt hot steam and yolk in my face and dropped the custard cup. I blinked a few times and realized that I didn't seem to have hot yolk in my eyes and my vision was just cloudy for a few seconds. Some yolk did land on my elbow and gave me a very minor burn. But, other than REALLY needing a shower, I'm unscathed. I am SO thankful God spared my eyes. I'm sure I could easily have done permanent damage to my vision.

If I'd been thinking clearly, I would have taken pictures of the egg on my face and in my hair (and all over my kitchen.) But, I was pretty shaken and still had a hungry daughter to feed! (I'll let you just wonder whether I picked the egg off my kitchen floor to feed her.)

Whoo hoo!

2007-04-10T08:16:00.000-07:00

When Abby was born, my parents gave us the fabulous gift of 4 house cleanings done by one of the sweetest women I've met, Symone. She really blessed us in my very difficult recovery from Abby's arrival. We hired her to clean every other week after our "gift cleanings" were done. In December I was feeling more in the swing of taking care of two kids and we really didn't have it in the budget to have Symone continue to clean, so we sadly parted ways.

Two weeks ago, I recieved a call from Symone asking if we could exchange services! She has a fourth grade son who needs some extra help in reading. So, I am going to tutor in exchange for cleaning! We are both thrilled with our arrangement. I am excited to use some of my rusty teaching skills and she is excited to have tutoring for her son. I think I have the better end of the deal, but she seems honestly happy with the arrangement!

There are some additional benefits as well. Totoring twice a week will give me some routine in my Tuesdays and Thursdays. And with "guests" in the house twice a week, I will have initiative to keep the house picked up between cleanings.

This isn't something we needed, but it is a sweet blessing to our family and me. It also allows me to feel confident about taking on some of the additional responsibilities at church that Danny and I have recently agreed to take on.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow! I am so thankful to be His daughter and that He expresses His love to me in such a personal way.

For Ian

2007-03-07T12:27:00.000-08:00

As promised long ago. The kids!

Welcome to the party!!!

2007-03-05T14:55:00.000-08:00

I'm late joining the blog party at 5 Minutes for Mom, but then again, I'm late for almost everything, so you may as well get used to it! :)

Hi! I'm Martha! No, not THAT Martha. Although, I love her show and I wouldn't mind being compared to her in my home keeping and organization. I did have a car that my friend named Stewart while I was in college. "Then we can see your car drive by and say, 'There goes Martha's Stewart!" G-R-O-A-N!

Not THAT Martha, either. Although, I identify with her as well. Perhaps not the character traits I'm most proud of.

I am a 28? 27? 27. Yes, 27 year old wife and mom of two. Why am I late joining the party you ask? Aren't the kids excited? Well, I'll let you take a look for yourself.

Let me introduce Joey. He's 2 and a half. He is running a temperature of 101.2 at the moment and is spending the afternoon with Caillou and his family.

Let me take you into the nursery and introduce you to Abby. Shh! She's not feeling well, either! She had Joey's fever last week and has been a stinker-pot today. Abby will be 9 months old tomorrow.

Please don't let me mislead you. My children are usually joyful, giggly and exuberant. Joey loves to play trains, jump on the bed and be in charge. Why not? He is the oldest child of two first-born children!
Abby is very mellow and loves to flirt with anyone who will let her. She is always moving her body and is trying with all her might to figure out how to crawl.

My blog is a brain dump for my thoughts on my life as a child of God, wife, mom, and the many other roles I serve. Thanks for attending our somewhat subdued party! I hope you will come visit again when everyone is feeling better!

Don't forget to wash your hands on the way out!

Conviction and family time

2007-02-19T08:54:00.000-08:00

Danny is home today for President's Day. We canceled playgroup (which was supposed to be at our house) at the last minute so that we could have our first day without any plans in an age! We also were/are in need of some family time after a busy week of wedding events. Joey provided the evidence of the need as we drove to our second birthday party yesterday and he exclaimed! "We go Ben's party! Daddy go! Mama go! Abby go! Jojo go!" It was exciting to see his joy at us going somewhere all together. We've had a lovely morning so far with bubble blowing and swinging outside and Mom and Dad got TWO! CUPS! OF! COFFEE!!! WITH! WHIPPED! CREAM!!! truly a delight in my world.

Our only plan for today is to go on a picnic at the park at lunchtime. I'd like to go for a run but that involves changing clothes and will make the shower and hair doing I'd like to skip today inevitable, so we'll see if I get my run in. I WILL spend some time with the Lord today. Everyday Mommy linked to some incredible writings called Just Suppose and A Fitting Vessel. Perhaps I will be able to reflect more on them here later, but for now, my heart is longing for time with God. So, that is what I am off to do.

My Daniel

2007-02-17T20:49:00.000-08:00

I had the honor of being a bridesmaid in one of my best friend's wedding today! This meme seemed appropriate as I reflect on the husband God's blessed me with.

His age: 29

How tall is he: 5'11'

How long have you been together (married): Married five years (it will be 6 in June!)

How long did you know each other before you got together?: We got to know each other through instant messenger for a few months before we began dating. We dated 3 days short of a year before we were married.

What physical features attracted you to him first?: His dark hair and understanding eyes

Eye color: Dark brown

Hair color: Dark brown

Hair style: Short, thick and wavy when it gets longer

Normal Outfit: Jeans and a t-shirt.

How did you meet: I wanted to attend a conference in Tucson while living in Flagstaff. I found Danny's instant messenger name on the church website, contacted him about the conference and we kept typing!

How serious is it: Til death do us part

Are you "in love": More each day!

Do your parents like him: Sometimes more than me! I'm kidding. He is fully incorporated as a part of the family.

Do his parents like you: They like me, I think. We don't hear much from them.

Do you trust him: With every fiber of my being.

Would you share a toothbrush with him?: Yuck! Only if I was desperate and could rinse it with Listerine.

Would he let you wear his pants?: Yep. I have a few times while pregnant.

Do you have a shirt of his that you sleep in?: Nah, I'm more likely to borrow his PJ bottoms. Well, I guess I do borrow his t-shirts once in awhile.

Do you like the way he smells?: Yes! He always compliments me when he smells me. He has a great smeller! :)

Can you picture having kids with him?: See footnotes labelled Joey and Abby

What bothers you the most about him?: Seeing him upset

Does he have a temper?: Only when driving or children aren't sleeping. Even then, it's VERY tame

Are you happy to be with him?: Estatic!

Does he embarrass you in public?: Isn't that his job? Just kidding!

Does he smoke or do drugs?: No and no.

Does he have any piercings?: No.

Any tattoos?: No.

Does he have any scars that you know of?: Many. More than 3 on his head. He had a rough and tumble boyhood.

Is he a Party dude or Stay at home?: Stay at home.

Is he Outgoing or Shy?: Both. It depends on the situation.

Would he hang out with you and YOUR friends?: Absolutely.

Sing?: To the kids and at church. He has a beautiful baritone voice!

I love you Daniel Philip. I'd say yes again any day!

The Libby Christening Gown

2007-02-08T19:48:00.000-08:00

Passed down my Mom's side of the family is a gorgeous christening gown which my Great Grandfather, Grandfather, Mom, and I all wore to our infant baptisms.
Danny and I have decided not to baptize our children as infants, instead they will be "dedicated" to the Lord as children. This has much the same meaning as the infant baptism I experienced. It is a promise by the parents and congregation to raise the child in the faith. (Baptism has nothing to do with salvation as some faiths believe.) It is a public profession of faith in Jesus Christ as your personal savior.
My infant baptism was "confirmed" when I professed my faith by joining my (Presbyterian) church at 13. (I did feel led to be baptized as an adult as a public profession of my faith and obedience.)
Because the baby dedications our church does are much less formal and later in life than newborn baptism, I choose to photograph Joey and Abby in the christening gown. We hope that someday our children will treasure these photos of themselves in this heirloom gown. We also look forward to the day they decide to be baptized as their own personal profession of faith!
Here is Joey in November of 2004. He is almost 4 months old and about the same size as Abby is now at 8 months! I remember thinking Joey looked feminine in these photos, but it is amazing to look at them and see so much boy in Joey! Especially compared to my fair girl! Boy, he was a chunk! His arms were already so long in the sleeves!
It's also quite evident I'm a much better photographer now with a much better camera. Thank you Matt Lang!

Here is Miss Abby at 8 months old. She is all girl! My angel! On second glance, her arms look too long for the sleeves too. But, she is 4 months older than Joey in these photos!

Another new template

2007-02-08T09:57:00.000-08:00

This one doesn't make me nauseous to look at. I HATED the old one. Now I just need some content on here! Posts coming soon...

Lots of kid photos...
Joey's use of KY mistable personal lubricant
The Ultimate Blog Party!

My celebrity look alikes

2007-02-06T08:42:00.000-08:00

The lesson I really learned from this? I have very few photos of myself. I typically don't enjoy looking at photos of myself, but the kids might appreciate documentation that I was around someday. :) We have lots of photos of Danny and the kids. Guess it's time for me to hand over the camera more.

Snow!

2007-01-25T11:02:00.000-08:00

This is belated but in January, we had some rare snow here in Tucson! Danny and I saw the snowfall in the evening, but nothing stuck on our side of town. Danny's work, however, was beautiful! Alli and I packed up the kids and caravaned to see the snow and the boys!

Joey experiments making footprints in the snow.

Our family!

Abby is wearing bunting which my Aunt made for me in 1979!

Matt, Mady, and Joey

Danny took a turn at lunch with the chunk-o-kids! Nathan and Abby

Anti Procrastination Challenge!

2007-01-25T09:50:00.000-08:00

Mrs. Wilt over at The Sparrows Nest is hosting an anti-procrastination challenge this week. I am joining a bit late, but a prize is up for grabs and I'll settle for any motivation to get some projects done!

My first project today was making a list of things I've been putting off but need to be done. I decided to begin by cleaning my refrigerator, a task I haven't done in a LONG time.

Here's my before. You can't see how dirty the shelves and walls of the fridge are.

I emptied the fridge of everything and wiped the entire inside down. I usually use glass cleaner and paper towels on the shelves, but we are out of paper towels. I didn't let this deter me. I used my scrubby sponge and water and just repeated to myself the Flylady mantra "Housework done incorrectly still blesses your family." Even though my shelves aren't streak free, they look SO much better!

I then sorted the contents of the fridge (which were on the counter) and check expiration dates. Many things ended up in the trash. I put the rest back and my fridge looks so much better!

I had wanted to get to the freezer and top of the fridge today and I still might, but for now, I'm proud of my accomplishment!

Please comment

2006-12-29T08:06:00.000-08:00

Please comment here. $1 will be donated to St Jude's Research Hospital for each comment (up to 500) Kelly receives in the next two days!

Thanks for the heads up, Shannon!

Forgot to give this a title!

2006-12-18T07:43:00.000-08:00

This should be a quiet week of staying close to home for us. It was a wonderfully busy weekend. We had a baby shower for Danny's sister, reunion with Ian who is home from NAU for the Christmas break, church festivities on Sunday, lunch with Danny's Mom and sisters after church, and a celebration for our good friend Kevin's birthday on Sunday evening! Needless to say, my kiddos need some time to get back on their normal schedules, especially Miss Abby who protests any disruption of her naps by waking up 3 or 4 times at night. She also has a very difficult time settling into sleep in the evening.
So, we are going stick close to the house for the rest of the week. I need to do a grocery run, but when depends on how long Abby sleeps this morning. Hopefully I can make it a short trip just to Safeway. I don't dare try to go to Walmart this week!
Anyway, I need to get this mealplan done and then shower!

Monday: Chili with corn
Tuesday: Spaghetti with homemade meatballs and salad
Wednesday: Crockpot Italian Chicken with rice and broccoli
Thursday: Homemade McMuffins
Friday: Dinner with friends
Saturday: Lasagna with Salad (make extra for Rach)
Sunday: Christmas Eve (who knows)
Monday: Christmas! Chocolate torte!

Making baby food

2006-12-13T12:14:00.000-08:00

Today was my first attempt to make baby food using the Kitchen Aid food grinder I received for my birthday. Thanks Mom and Dad!

I had some carrots ready to cook, so I popped them in the microwave for about 11 minutes. I did stir them halfway through.

Here they are ready to be ground. I checked to see if they were ready by sticking a fork in them Nice and soft!

Into the grinder!
Don't forget to have a bowl ready!

The carrots are pretty pumpy, so I put them through a few times. They still ended up pulpy, but because Abby hasn't been exposed to how smooth store bought baby food is, I think this will be fine. If she doesn't like the texture, I can put them in the blender.

I ended up adding a lot of the liquid I cooked them in to make them pretty runny. As Abby gets older, I assume I will add less liquid.
Finally, I put them in a nice Tupperware ice cube tray I had found at Goodwill. I will freeze the carrots into cubes and then pop them into a baggie and store them in the freezer.

My tray even has a nice lid! :)

Voila! Easy baby food! I loved the grinder. I had tried a hand grinder for Joey and it was a ton of work. This was very simple and fast. Cleanup was a breeze, too. Many of the parts are dishwasher safe, but it was very easy to just was out by hand!

Decorating Cookies

2006-12-13T11:59:00.000-08:00

We spent some time last night decorating cookies! A good time was had by all. I was impressed that Joey even decorated more cookies than he ate . He did try spreading frosting on cookies and licking it off repeatedly. Smart kid. If I could get away with it, I'd do the same!

First you get some frosting...

Then you spread it just like this...

Look what I made!

Daddy and Abs joining in the fun.

I worked too! (I'm on the phone conspiring with Dad about Christmas.)

A sampling of our finished product!

Photo Session!

2006-12-11T20:31:00.000-08:00

On Saturday, Danny and Joey were working on the cars, so Abby and I played glamor shots! Here's Miss Abby at 6 months old! I can't get over how beautiful she is.
You can't resist smiling back at her, can you?

Here's her more "scholarly" face.

Joey and Danny joined us after a bit. This was our attempt to get a photo of the kids together. It didn't turn out great, but the grandparents will love it anyway! :)

Doctor's Appt Update

2006-12-11T16:02:00.000-08:00

So, because my posts right now are so boring, I decided I better load up on the pictures! These are of the kiddos in the bathtub last night. It was Abby's first bath sitting up. She loved it! Most of the photos turned out blurry, but I had to share her expression in the second one!

I finished picking up the east side of the house. I think Danny is going over to Nanay's (my grandmother) house tonight to help her with her computer this evening once the kiddos are asleep. I'll use that time to do a quick pick up of our room. The house should then be in good shape for cleaning.

We made it to playgroup just a little bit late this morning. We stopped at the bank on the way to deposit some checks. I love making deposits! :) Joey was having a great time playing, so when I told him "It's time to go to the doctor, say goodbye to Quinton (the friend who was hosting playgroup)." Joey looked up from his toy, waved at me and said "Bye Quinton!" He didn't understand that he needed to leave. Thankfully some of my sweet friends volunteered to watch him while I ran Abby to her appointment. It was really nice to have some alone time with Abby and not have to worry about keeping Joey entertained while I helped as Abby was given her shots.

Abby weighs... drumroll please... 17lbs 15oz! She's a big girl, in the 85 percentile, but not nearly as big as her brother was at 6 months. I am pleased because we can get a couple more months use out of the infant carseat.

I asked the doctor about cereal and he said I was asking "good questions." He told me that infants usually deplete their iron stores between 6 and 9 months. (There is an iron level test that will be done at her 9 month appt.) I can give her spinach to boost her iron. Or, he said cereal once a day certainly won't hurt her. He also said she doesn't need solids yet, but by 9 months should be eating table food regularly. Then he told me I have 3 months to get her there. He was very comfortable with me holding off on solids longer. I actually got out a pack of banana baby food that we were given to let Abby try at dinner tonight. Danny got the camera and the batteries were dead. Then the next set he tried were dead. We decided to hold off because we want pictures of her first experience of food! Poor Abby, she may never try solids! :)

Happy Monday!

2006-12-11T08:12:00.000-08:00

Good morning! I know I've said this before, but I LOVE the fresh start of a Monday morning. We have a busy morning today, so this will be brief. We'll head to playgroup just as soon as I finish drying my hair and brush my teeth. (Aren't you glad your computer doesn't have smell-o-vision?) We'll only be able to stay at playgroup for about an hour and then we'll head to the pediatrician's office for Abby's 6 month checkup. I'm eager to see what she weighs and learn her percentiles! I also am going to talk to the doctor about beginning solid foods and if baby cereal has any redeeming qualities or is just iron fortified empty calories as I suspect. If so, we'll begin with veggies. I have some different goals for feeding Abby than I did with Joey. I'd like to share more foods just off our plates rather than giving her lots of jarred baby food. My understanding is that she gets all her nutrition until she's one through breastmilk, so she doesn't need "meals" of the baby food. She just needs to practice eating skills. It makes sense to me to practice with "real food." This could turn into an entire new post.

Other things to fill my day... laundry! I know you were wondering if I got caught up! Yeah right! :) I also need to do an sweep through the house to pick up because our sweet cleaning lady comes tomorrow!

Opps! I didn't get this posted this morning before I left. Well, here it is. I'm going to pick up the east side of my house and then I'll post a Dr's visit update!

Chocolate Cappuccino Torte

2006-12-08T10:54:00.000-08:00

This is the most rich torte I've ever tasted! It's delicious! It's a recipe from my dear friend Alli which was given to her by her sister. It has been a feature at my and my close friend's wedding and baby showers and important events. It's becoming a tradition!

Danny bought me my own spring form pan for my birthday so chocolate cappuccino torte can now be a family tradition as well.

Without further ado...

Chocolate Cappuccino Torte
8oz semi sweet baking chocolate (I used semi sweet chocolate chips)
12oz milk chocolate chips
1C whipping cream
2T instant coffee (decaf if you want to temper the caffeine from the chocolate)
1t vanilla
1/2C flour
1/4C sugar
5 eggs
1/4C coffee liquor

In heavy saucepan (or double boiler), heat chocolate, whipping cream, and coffee over low heat until melted, stirring constantly. Cool to room temperature.

In large bowl, beat eggs, coffee liquor, and vanilla with electric mixer until combined. Add flour and sugar. Beat on high speed for 8 minutes. Batter should be light and slightly thickened.

Fold 1/4 of egg mixture into chocolate mixture. Fold chocolate mixture into remaining egg mixture.

Pour into greased and floured 9" spring form pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 40-45 minutes until slightly puffed around outer edge and soft in the middle. Cool in pan on wire rack for 20 minutes. Remove sides and cool completely.

Cover and chill up to 24 hours. Let stand at room temperature for 30 minutes before serving.

A few notes... bake on a cookie sheet. Chances are, the spring form pan will leak a bit. One torte can serve quite a few people because it is so rich!

Ahh... Friday!

2006-12-08T08:51:00.000-08:00

Hello to my many readers! All two of you! (Hi Mom! Hi Danny!) :) I am so thankful today is Friday. It's been a good week, but I'm ready to have Danny home for the weekend!

I do have plenty to fill my day. I am still working on catching up laundry! It's too depressing to think how long it's been since I've been caught up. I made great strides this week, but with four people soiling laundry everyday, it just piles back up! I really really really want to see the empty bottom of my laundry baskets! I also need to figure out a new plan for Abby's laundry. We've had a basket by her changing table. It's super convenient when changing her, but her laundry tends to pile up while the rest of ours (which gets put in the baskets outside the laundry room) is much easier for me to get done. So, perhaps I'll just remove the basket and turn it into a hand wash basket in the laundry room.

I also need to peel potatoes and get them into the crockpot for some potato soup for tonight. We are going to a friend's house to prepare cookies and frosting for an ABF party tomorrow evening. So, dinner and laundry, that's all I'm going to try to get done today. If I get more done, hooray!!!

In kiddo news... Abby has learned to sit up on her own! If I can get blogger to cooperate, I'll attach some photos of the kids playing with their new Veggie Tales Nativity Set. Abby is so happy to be a part of the action while Joey is playing. It is amazing to watch her look at Joey in such awe. It's completely different than how she looks at us. She ADORES him! May I look to Christ like she looks to her big brother! We also have been letting her cry at night. It's so sad and she has quite the stamina for crying! But, this is what she's been looking like when we wake up in the morning (she's been sleeping late) and she doesn't look too traumatized!

I'm off.

STRIKEOUT!!! (My goal today)

2006-12-05T08:01:00.000-08:00

Good Morning! I am sitting here this morning sipping my coffee and thinking through my day. It's going to be a busy one! We are having some new friends over who I met at the park. J is coming with her two daughters who are both less than a month from my kiddos in age. It shoudl be fun, although I confess I'm a bit nervous. So, I need to get my todo list written and get to work! I'll update later with how day 2 of my carb restricted diet is going. I usually weigh myself in the morning before breakfast, but yesterday I weighed myself at the end of the day and was 135. I'm happy with this as a starting point. I was expecting to see about 140!

Things to bless my family today...

Unload and reload dishwasher
Clean kitchen counters
More laundry
Clean guest bathroom
Christmas decor cleaned off the living room floor
Vacuum
Make lunch

I'll update with my new ~~strikeout~~ html skills as I get things done!

Happy Tuesday!

Whew! BORING!

2006-12-04T09:19:00.000-08:00

I just looked at my blog and I was bored! I need some color in a bad way! I am hoping to post soon about Moms for Modesty, advent, pictures of our Christmas decor... but first I need to get though my house chores! Perhaps I can ask my sweet husband for some redesign help this week.

What am I keeping busy with today?
~~picking up the master bedroom~~
cleaning ~~the living room~~ and kitchen
conquering the laundry pile (23 loads folded, ironed and put away)
meal planning
~~playgroup (although I'm on a roll cleaning, so I may ditch today)~~(ditched)
jesse tree preparations
keeping up with a busy boy and girl!

Whew! That should be enough! I'm also working on keeping the television OFF all day long! Even after the kids go to bed! Time to pop in some Christmas hymns, email the playgroup host, and work some more!

Monday, Monday, so good to me

2006-11-20T08:43:00.000-08:00

Happy Monday! I sure love the beginning of the week. It feels like a fresh start and I love new beginnings! Is it any wonder I love my Lord whose mercies are new every morning? Today is playgroup, shopping for Jesse Tree making materials, Monday pickup, and some catch up on my Bible study.

We had a rough night with Abby. She doesn't like to sleep alone. Danny and I ended up taking turns on the couch with her last night. I woke up with a headache. I think the couch puts my spine out of alignment and gives me a headache. It's time for Danny and I to bite the tough love bullet and let her do some crying at night. She's ready to sleep, she just has learned that if she cries, we'll come rescue her!

Saturday was my 27th birthday! My family and friends gave me a lovely weekend-long celebration. On Saturday morning, my love went and bought me doughnuts (because calories don't count on your birthday!) and I took Joey to the library. It's rare for Joey and I to go somewhere alone, so it was a special treat. We bought Safeway deli sandwiches for lunch and went and ate on the side of the road and cheered on bikers in El Tour de Tucson, a huge local event. It was SO fun to cheer on the riders. We got a nod or "thank you" from almost everyone we clapped and cheered for.

In the afternoon, we had a party for Danny, my dear friend Andrea, and me (all November birthdays) with a group of our friends we call "the crew." We played croquet at a park near our house and then came hone and had lasagna, bread, salad, pie and root beer floats! It was wonderful!

On Sunday morning, we had a nice time at church. I gave an introduction to an activity we are doing next week. (See previous post on Jesse Trees.) Our worship time was fun with a focus on Thankfulness. In the afternoon, we went to my parent's house and celebrated my birthday with my Mom and Dad, Aunt and cousin and Grandma. It was fun even with a testy two year old!

Speaking of two year olds, mine has disappeared, which probably means he just pooped. Lovely.

Update: Joey pooped and then came and asked to use the potty (successfully!) That's a good sign, right?

Have a great Monday!

Jesse Tree Information (For the ABF)

2006-11-19T06:04:00.000-08:00

My dear ABF friends, here is your "homework" for next week.

Talk to your spouse and decide what you want your Jesse tree to look like. Remember it can be a small tree, a branch, posterboard, your regular Christmas tree, a wreath, whatever suits you! There are a few examples of Jesse trees in the link list below.
Please bring what you are going to use with you to ABF next week. For example, if you want to make your ornaments out of felt, please bring the felt and glue with you for our project day. I will make sure we have cardstock copies of what I used in ABF this week as well as crayons and markers, so if that is what you'd like to use to begin your tree, just bring yourself!
Remember, this year could just be a start for your tree. This is a tradition you can add on to easily year by year.

Links to more Jesse Tree information and ideas

Jesse Tree devotions and patterns(these are the symbols and readings I'm providing in ABF) http://www.rca.org/NETCOMMUNITY/Page.aspx?&pid=1628&srcid=1602

Great Biblical Overview of the history of Jesse Trees http://www.cresourcei.org/jesse.html
Another example as well as additional patterns http://www.domestic-church.com/CONTENT.DCC/19971201/FRIDGE/FRIDGE1.HTM

More pictures of beautiful Jesse Trees http://www.jesse-tree.com/

Some books about Jesse Trees

Patterns for Jesse tree symbols http://www.christianbook.com/Christian/Books/product?item_no=7214394&event=61984SBF|141216|55020

Stories to share about the Jesse Tree http://www.christianbook.com/Christian/Books/product?item_no=52884&event=55020CRS|1219782|55020#curr

Jesse Tree Readings (includes devotionals for both adults and children) http://www.christianbook.com/Christian/Books/product?item_no=7009081&event=61984SBF|122589|55020#curr

See you next week for our project day!
:) Martha

29 things I love about my hubby on his 29th birthday!

2006-11-09T10:24:00.000-08:00

1. You love God first.
2. You love me and you've seen my worst.
3. You love our babies.
4. You cry at commercials.
5. You are a cuddler.

6. You do more than your share of housework.
7. You are a natural with kids.
8. You listen to me.
9. You're a peacemaker.
10. That little scar on your chin.

11. You fit in, are comfortable with, and love my family.
12. You pray with Joey.
13. You've stuck with the church you were raised in.
14. You have the patience of a saint.
15. You hold my hand during meetings.

16. You take care of those you love.
17. You ohh and aww over Joey's art.
18. You change poopy diapers.
19. You know how to grill.
20. You choose good friends with good wives.

21. You're willing to drive a paid for older car.
22. I relax in your arms.
23. You make coffee for me even though I'm the morning person.
24. You enjoy spending time at home.
25. Best. Dad. Ever.

26. You don't get irritated when I call you over just to look at our sleeping babies.
27. You asked.
28. You open the covers for me when I get into bed after nursing Abby.
29. You're my best friend.

I love you, honey! Happy birthday!

Adventures at Bible Study

2006-10-26T10:09:00.000-07:00

Last night we had quite an eventful Bible study meeting. We celebrated completely finishing our first book in 3 or so years of meeting! I had carpooled with my dear friend Tina. The poor girl ended up leaving soon after we arrived due to debilitating pain in her ankle. Poor thing. Call your doctor, missy! In the meantime we'll keep praying.

We plowed through the study and enjoyed some good discussion although it was taking a LONG time to get through the questions. Our friend Sara needed to leave at 8:45 to get home and into bed because she needed to get up early. As she left, unbeknownst to her, a bird flew into the house! We were glad to realize it was a bird and not a bat, but we were all puzzled about how to remove the bird.

The next 15-20 minutes were spend shrieking, ducking, and flashing the lights on and off to encourage the bird to move toward the door. We waved a broom and pillows at it, clapped and yelled at it. We even giggled a LOT! It must have been quite a sight watching 4 grown women chase this bird. We thought about trying to capture the bird in a towel. We weren't brave enough to really follow through on that plan, though!

The poor bird spent his time inside trying to fly up and banging into the ceiling. My friend's ceiling was thoroughly dotted with feathers and had some blood smears at the end. The bird in his desperation to get to a safe place, must have cut his head.

The girls finally chased the bird outside and slammed the door shut when it looked like the bird might come back into the house. Whew! We all had more than a little adrenaline flowing at that point. We laughed and laughed in relief. My sweet friend and her husband and another friend were up until 2am cleaning the house!

It was an event we will never never forget and one I'm content to not relive. :)

A REAL duct tape Bible

2006-10-21T13:57:00.000-07:00

A post at Everyday Mommy about the marketing of a "duct tape Bible" reminded me of Danny's childhood Bible which is REAL duct tape Bible. We have pictures of Danny holding this Bible as a seven year old, and the edges are already ragged in the photo. Judging by the notes inside, I'd guess Danny carried this Bible through high school. I can think of a few times in our marriage when Danny grabbed this Bible to take to church. I wonder when he needed the duct tape to hold it together.
I can't say I'm against the marketing of a Bible with a duct tape cover. But, my prayer for my children is that they love the word of God enough to eventually need some duct tape to hold their Bible together.

Recipe Swap!

2006-10-17T08:05:00.000-07:00

I'm joining Tammy at Tammy's Times for a soup recipe swap. It's finally been cool enough here to turn off the air conditioning so bring on the soups! Yesterday we had some dear friends over for dinner and I made yummy crockpot potato soup, a recipe I was given by Danny's Mom. The original source is First EV Free Women's Ministry here in Tucson.

Crockpot Potato Soup

6 Potatoes, peeled and cubed
1 chopped onion (I use the frozen kind- no tears!)
1-2 carrots (I leave out)
1-2 celery sticks (I sometimes leave out)
4 chicken bullion cubes
1 Tbs parsley
5 C water
1.5 tsp salt
dash of pepper
1/3 cup margerine or butter, cut into pats
13oz can evaporated milk

Place all ingredients except evaporated milk into crockpot with butter on top. Cook on low for 10-12 hours. During the last hour, stir in 1 13oz can evaporated milk.

Yummy and easy!

Can you tell they had immunizations yesterday?

2006-10-10T14:56:00.000-07:00

This has been how most of the day has been spent.

Abigail Emma

2006-10-10T14:42:00.000-07:00

I couldn't resist having a mini photo shoot this morning after dressing Abby. I didn't quite figure out how to use the light in my first photo, but her smile is so sweet!

I love the light and how you can see the depth in her eyes.

I love the way the little hairs peek out from beneath her cap!

Entertaining the toddler I

2006-10-10T14:17:00.000-07:00

I'm hoping to do a series of posts about things I do daily to keep Joey entertained and challenged a bit. I bought a set of fun foam beads at Walmart. I also picked up some pipe cleaners because I didn't think Joey had the dexterity to string the beads on the sting provided with the beads. Yesterday we made some bracelets together. We had a great time! (I even snuck in some labelling of the colors and shapes as we strung the beads!)

Danny and I learned the hard way that it is wise to give Joey a limited number of beads at a time. Yesterday I filled the lid with beads for us to use.

Here's Joey working on his bracelet.

Joey showing off his finished product.

My finished product!

Homemade bread

2006-10-10T14:03:00.000-07:00

On Saturday, my ABF (Adult Bible Fellowship, or Sunday School class) had a ladies get together and were given a bread baking lesson by my dear friend, Andrea. We had a wonderful time and the results were wonderful! I made one regular loaf of whole wheat bread and two small "tea sandwich" loaves with the excess dough. I used my Pampered Chef style bread tubes to make the tea sandwich style bread. Joey has LOVED this shaped bread and finished the second loaf today! I made a scalloped loaf, which Joey called "flower bread" and a heart shaped loaf. My pride is really in the regular sandwich loaf which I cut into today. It turned out beautifully! Baking bread is a great women's gathering activity because it allows for lots of chatting breaks while the bread rests.

This is Joey enjoying a "flower bread peanut butter sandwich" for breakfast (at his request.) He would eat peanut butter morning, noon, and night if given the option! The bread tubes make the bread an excellent size for toddler sandwiches. No crusts, either!

This is my loaf of regular sandwich bread. Beautiful, no? The decoration on the top is supposed to be a M heart D, but it didn't turn out very clearly. It's very delicious, though! Especially topped with some honey butter!

Have you ever? (My answers are in red

2006-10-09T13:49:00.000-07:00

HAVE YOU EVER...

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
83. Gotten flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried one/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
98. Passed out cold
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

Four Months

2006-10-06T12:22:00.000-07:00

Today my Abby is four months old. It's hard to imagine. It's gone so fast. I know it will continue to go faster than I will be able to take in. Sigh. She's so beautiful.

Joey's expressing his love and jealously more and more clearly and frequently with her. He calls her "Abby" "sis-r" and "baby." He loves to give her kisses and hugs. He often asks to hold her.
Both Abby and Joey cry when the other cries. They show lots of empathy for the other's state of being. Most of the time. :)

At the beginning of the month, we were a bit worried about Abby not lifting her head enough when put on her tummy.
After some practice and investing in a Bumbo (which she and we love), she's doing great! Today she spent her first significant time in the Exersaucer. Abby is so interested in the world around her, especially what Joey's doing. I have a feeling this won't ever change. Abby has a smile that lights up her whole face and all of those around her as well. She's beginning to giggle, too! She continues to be an awesome sleeper. Often sleeping ALL afternoon and then ALL night! Abby has discovered her hands in the past few weeks and they are an endless source of entertainment. Today at nap time, she sucked a pacifier and held another while she fell asleep. She's becoming more and more adept at grasping at things around her.

It hasn't been the easiest adjustment, going from being a mom to one to a mom of two. But, it's been worth every moment of frustration. Your smile makes the world around us disappear. I love you, my Abby girl.

It's official...

2006-10-06T10:05:00.000-07:00

...Last night I ruined instant chocolate pudding. Yes, 5 minute, add milk, mix, and put in the fridge pudding. What went wrong? Well, I decided to try a tip I read on Works for Me Wednesday about mixing powdered drinks (I've also heard this for adding cornmeal) You add just a bit of liquid to the powder to make a paste and then the paste easily stirs into the rest of the liquid. BUT, apparently pudding mix has an addative that causes it to begin to congeal as soon as it gets wet, so as I tried to make a paste, I got clumps and by the time I added the rest of the milk, it wasn't able to absord any more liquid.

Dork. Yes. I. Am.

What does this blog need?

2006-10-05T16:43:00.000-07:00

Pictures of the kids!!! Abby wasn't quite as fond of the glasses as Joey was.

Allowing regression

2006-10-05T09:28:00.000-07:00

This morning I had two babies on my lap. Abby was nursing on the boppy pillow and Joey began acting out, throwing his cup across the room seeking my attention. I decided to try my experiment again, allowing Joey to regress for a few minutes and be Mama's baby who needs attention just like Abby. So, because I had a bottle sitting next to me (I had tried to get Abby to take it earlier and she refused.) I allowed Joey to lie on the boppy at at Abby's feet and I fed him the bottle. He was my baby again for a few minutes.

I worry a little that this technique will backfire and he won't want to be a big boy again, but I predict that he enjoys his "big boy" toys and food too much to stay in baby mode for long. So, I allow a few moments during the day for him to safely regress with Mama's guidance and permission. After he finished his bottle (yes, it had about 2 ounces of breast milk, no, it won't kill him) he balked at being burped like Abby and was ready to be a big boy again. Next time he wants to regress, I may put formula in the bottle. I think it will discourage him from actually drinking the bottle, but will allow the cuddling and attention from Mom he desires.

The other "guided regression" we did last week was swaddling and being held in my lap after Joey had watched me do the same for Abby before I put her down for her nap. That cuddling was very enjoyable for both of us!

I could be damaging my child forever, but I doubt it.

Works for me Wednesday! (vinyl tableclothes)

2006-09-01T12:53:00.000-07:00

Yippee! I have been looking forward to participating in this! What works for me is using vinyl tablecloths on the carpet. The felt on the back sticks like velcro to the carpet and it protects your floor from food when "picnicking" in front of the TV, I mean, if you do that sort of thing. I don't. My son isn't eating a sandwich and watching Mr. Rogers while I type a blog entry. I'm not that bad a Mom. Another great use is when hosting more children than you have booster seats or high chairs for. It also protects the carpet from play dough, stray crayon or marker and paint! I'm sure I'll think of many more uses in the future. I have photos, but blogger doesn't want to upload them for me. Blogger, doesn't work for me. Vinyl tableclothes to protect the carpet, works for me!

For more Works for Me Wednesday ideas see Shannon at Rocks in My Dryer.

Thursday Thirteen

2006-08-31T16:32:00.000-07:00

Thirteen things I'd like to do to get the house ready for fall.

Set the table with a pretty tablecloth and centerpiece.
Make a wheat bundle for the mantle.
Set out popcorn votives.
Get blinds installed on windows.
Wash the windows before we install the blinds.
Wash the curtains so everything is clean and pretty.
Fertilize grass.
Weed backyard.
Plan tree and plant placement in backyard.
Spend lots of time playing with my children.

BFF (Best Friends Forever)

2006-08-31T09:25:00.000-07:00

God has blessed me so richly through an incredible group of girlfriends and sisters in Christ. We meet weekly and are currently studying Second Timothy with the guidance of Kay Arthur and the book Walking in Power, Love and Discipline.

I'm thankful for the study, but I'm more thankful for the women I am journeying with. They have taught me so much about how to be a sister, a better wife, and a more patient mom. They hear my serious prayer requests as well as the silly ones. They listen even when I talk too much and love my unconditionally. I am beginning to recognize that not everyone has friendships like ours. Thank you girls. And thank you Lord of Hosts for caring enough to bless me with friends such as these!

Philippians 2:1-4 (NIV)
If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

He's going to kill me someday for this...

2006-08-30T15:48:00.000-07:00

"Milk comes from Joey's boob."

Mommy on a milk carton?

2006-08-30T14:11:00.000-07:00

The three of us were napping this afternoon when I woke up and saw that the door to the linen closet was open. It took me a while to process, but I finally decided that I hadn't left it open so Joey must be up. I got up and confirmed that his door was open and quietly called him. I glanced into the laundry room and see him getting up from where he was curled up by the door out to the garage. He wasn't upset, but put his arms out for me to scoop him up. My heart melted as I figured out what had happened.

"Could you not find Mommy?"

"Yeah"

"Did you think she was in the garage?"

"Yeah" And he snuggled into my shoulder.

I'm assuming that he quickly looked into the living room for me and missed that I was lying on the couch. This afternoon, I had brought him in from the car where he'd fallen asleep on his way home from church and put him into bed. He must not have been aware that time passed while he was sleeping and thought I was getting Abby out of the car still. I'm thankful he wasn't scared. I wish I could know how long he looked for me before he camped out at the back door. I'm also thankful for the Mommy radar that did wake me up. Thank you Lord!

The Quotable Martha

2006-08-28T20:10:00.000-07:00

"The only way childbirth is not natural is if the baby comes out your nose."

"It's much sexier if you think of them, not as granny panties, but as really short shorts."

Missing Uncle

2006-08-28T19:45:00.000-07:00

One of the first things Joey said to us this morning was "Uncle house today?" He is missing his Uncle Ian. "Uncle" had his first day of classes at NAU (Go Lumberjacks!) today.

Blogging, again!

2006-08-17T12:30:00.000-07:00

So, I feel a bit guilty about using a name for my blog that someone else is already using in blogger. But, I swear I titled my former blog all by myself long ago!

So, let me introduce myself. I am Martha. No not THAT martha! No, not THAT martha either! I am a wife to my beloved husband, Daniel. I am a Mom to Joey (2 years) and Abby (2 months). Most importantly I am a child of the King and I am counting on His promise to finish his good work in me!

"... being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippians 1:6